1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
