her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
