im drinking this country out of the recession.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Randomize
