How'd it feel making her break her religion?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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