dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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