do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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