Cold hands, warm shart.
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize