you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Fuck appropriateness.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize
