I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
