i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
