Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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