I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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