So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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