Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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