i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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