How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
