How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
