I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He told me they were just razor bumps!
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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