i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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