I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Randomize