dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
