jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
