i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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