i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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