just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
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