How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
