party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
