remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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