I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
