So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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