South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
