it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Welp...herpes.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Can you repeat that, but with context?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
