Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
