I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
