Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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