I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize
