Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
