I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
