And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Randomize
