Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
