i just wanna soil my oats bro
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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