her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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