Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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