Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
