i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
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