Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Randomize
