UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
