lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Randomize
