You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
