My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
